October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month

October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month

October is PREGNANCY AND INFANT LOSS AWARENESS MONTH. Please join with me in raising awareness for this life-changing experience. October is a time to… Remember the children that have died. Celebrate their lives and how they live on in our hearts. Break down the taboos around this type of loss. Give needed support to families. Honor bereaved mothers and fathers, brothers and sisters, extended family and friends.   At this very special time of year, Wanted Chosen Planned (and my book and film: Expecting Sunshine) will have a butterfly takeover! This takeover is to help remember, celebrate and spark conversation.   If you are to Google “butterfly symbolism” this is what will come up: Butterflies are deep and powerful representations of life....

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Never Alone

Never Alone

Kids say the most profound things. Yesterday, Christmas Day 2015, my daughter Hannah startled me with a comment. Our family was driving to visit my parents and en route we were discussing the fact that not everyone has someone to spend the holidays with. Christmas is not an easy time of year for everyone. From the backseat Hannah said, “Mommy, you are never alone – you have baby with you all the time.” She was talking about my second Rainbow Baby, the child I am 37 weeks anxiously expecting. Then Hannah continued: “And Zachary is always with you too!” This realization made me smile. My first son, my baby that I miss dearly; he is always with me. Zachary is never far from my thoughts. My love for him never wanes. I am never...

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Will My Family Ever Be Complete? The Decision to have a Child after Loss

Will My Family Ever Be Complete? The Decision to have a Child after Loss

Having children after the death of a child can be one of the scariest decisions and processes there is. For some, conception alone is not an easy road. For others, the stress only begins when the two pink lines appear… side-by-side with the realization that nine months is a long time to worry for the safety and health of your next child. BUT, before all these joys and worries, is the decision to have another child in the first place. I believe it is important to note that not everyone has this ability to chose – and that is a loss worth grieving in itself. The very question of whether or not to try again can cause an emotional rollercoaster. Of course the decision to have more children is influenced by many factors – yet for people who have previously lost...

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Talking to Kids about Death

Talking to Kids about Death

When Zachary died, Hannah was eleven months old. She came to the hospital after her younger brother died in my arms. She was very curious and touched Zachary’s head. She was all smiles despite the sniffles and tears in the room. She didn’t understand what had happened then, but she does now – I think. I have had many discussions with Hannah about where her first little brother went. She calls him Zachy. While I sometimes stretch the truth with Hannah, telling her things like she will go to kid jail if she is mean, I somehow felt compelled to tell her the truth about Zachary. I told her that Zachary died. I told her that Mommy and Daddy were very sad – although she must have sensed this. I tried very hard to be happy for her, but she would rest her hand on my...

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Easter Reflections: Finding Faith, Losing Faith

Easter Reflections: Finding Faith, Losing Faith

It’s interesting how the loss of a child affects each individual so differently. From the way that people talk about their child and the loss, to how they grieve and respond to others, there is nothing cookie cutter about this experience. With Easter a week away, I’m thinking about colorful eggs, bunnies – and faith. I once met with a woman over coffee whose baby had died and in sharing her story with me she spoke of how the loss brought her closer to God. She was a Christian before her child passed away, and in the aftermath she found a great deal of comfort and grace in processing her grief through her faith. There are also people who find faith for the first time after traumatic experiences. Or to the opposite extreme, lose their faith entirely. For...

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Portraits of Healing in The Quiet Rebuild

Art can heal. It may sound corny but it’s true. The language of art is not like a spoken dialect; art touches the human heart through contrast, color, symbolism, metaphor and personal and creative expression. You don’t have to be an artist or even have a clue what I’m talking about for art to make a difference for you. I can help! If any of this resonates with you (or even sparks your curiosity), I am still looking for volunteers to participate in fine art portraits for my work, The Quiet Rebuild. This is an opportunity to share your story of love and loss and survival. Please get in touch if you are interested: info@alexismariechute.com You can read more about the project here on Wanted, Chosen, Planned – Portraits of Healing and you can...

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