A Tattoo to Remember

A Tattoo to Remember

I heard something really interesting last night at the class I teach called Healing Art for Mourning Parents. The class is all about using different creative methods to help process grief and also to help remember the children lost too soon. We were making collages and one gentleman in the group included an image of a person being tattooed. I asked him about why he chose that image and he said because it was like being scarred with remembrance. I thought that was an interesting response.   Do you have a tattoo to remember your child? If you are comfortable, please share about your tattoo (or a picture) in the comments.   I have thought about getting a tattoo for many years, but I think my needle phobia would prevent more than a permanent little dot on my skin....

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Sharing Family Stories

Sharing Family Stories

Sharing Family Stories of Loss and Love… on Wanted, Chosen, Planned Sharing stories is so important. We live in a culture that gobbles up well-told stories – from novels to comics to movies and theatre. Stories are not only at the heart of our culture but also of our families. We share generational recipes, the history of our ancestry and time honoured traditions. So why is it hard for us as a society to talk about our losses? Being open and vulnerable with our feelings around love and loss can be incredibly healing. Bottling up emotions can lead to stress and the breakdown of communication. Authentic communication, from the heart, can be a comfort to the isolation of grief. Plus, our children matter, both those with us and those that live on in spirit....

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Baby Steps Memorial Walk this Sunday

Baby Steps Memorial Walk this Sunday

This Sunday, October 4, 2015, is the Baby Steps Memorial Walk in Edmonton, Alberta. I am honoured to share my reflections on this life after loss in the keynote speech. I was not able to speak at the Walk in August, as planned, because of a scary finding in my current pregnancy. If you want to read about my experience, you can click here. Feeling much more optimistic, I am looking forward to connecting with the special community of those in and around Edmonton this Sunday. There are so many who have been through the death of a child and yet are so open, welcoming and compassionate. It is an incredible group of individuals. I would encourage you, if you have lost a child, please consider attending the Baby Steps Walk or another event in your area. It truly makes a...

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Baby Steps Memorial Walk: Dates

Baby Steps Memorial Walk: Dates

Save the Dates for the two upcoming Baby Steps Memorial Walks. This year there are two locations, and I am honoured to give the keynote speech at both. Here are the details: SHERWOOD PARK, ALBERTA: Sunday, August 30th, 2015 Festival Place Peace Park 100 Festival Way, Sherwood Park, AB T8A 5T2 – And – EDMONTON, ALBERTA: Sunday, October 4, 2015 Rundle Park 2909 113 Ave NW, Edmonton, AB T5W 0P3   Mission of the events: “A special time to recognize all our babies who have died during pregnancy or anytime after birth. Walk with us to remember, with love, the precious moments of your little one’s life.”   Click here to visit the Baby Steps Memorial Walk website.   Learn more about the Walks by clicking here.   There will be a teddy bear donation at the...

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Remembering Ruby: Guest Post by Sara Kalke

Remembering Ruby: Guest Post by Sara Kalke

I am pleased to introduce Sara Kalke. It is an honor for me to share Sara’s story here on Wanted Chosen Planned. I met Sara over three years ago shortly after her daughter Ruby passed away. We had an instant connection based on our losses and now I am proud to call her friend. I invited Sara to share her story here on Wanted Chosen Planned and I’m honored she agreed. Welcome Sara! Sara’s Story  My daughter, Ruby Jayne, weighed 6 pounds 10 ounces when she was born.  She had beautiful dark curly hair.  She had ten fingers and ten toes.  She had her daddy’s nose and my lips.  She filled my arms just like a newborn should.  She fit perfectly into the pink onesie I had ready for her in my hospital bag.  She looked sweet and kind and full of the...

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How to Celebrate Bereaved Dads on Father’s Day

How to Celebrate Bereaved Dads on Father’s Day

Bereaved dads don’t get enough support – and our society doesn’t encourage them to ask for it when they need it. My husband Aaron grieved so differently than me. We were night and day. I was open, crying, needing to talk about our loss all the time, and could not focus on day to day concerns; they were meaningless to me for so long. For Aaron on the other hand, he shoved his emotions down and threw himself into his work. He didn’t talk about Zachary very often, if ever, unless I brought him up. He said all the right things to me, but was disassociated from our loss and our relationship. This was his way of coping. It was an extremely challenging time for us both. I have learned that the typical male and female grief patterns are not right and wrong in themselves,...

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