International Bereaved Mother’s Day: Honoring our Birth Stories

International Bereaved Mother’s Day: Honoring our Birth Stories

Today we celebrate International Bereaved Mother’s Day. We honor precious children that have died and their Mothers whose love and bravery are to be respected and commended. The loss of a child is one of the most painful experiences a person can endure. At the same time, speaking for myself, I would never erase my pain. It is evidence of love. It speaks to the short but meaningful life of my first son, Zachary. Yes, my memories are tinged with sadness, but more so they are shrouded with love. Do you notice my theme here? LOVE Love is what binds us. Love sustains us. Love is the answer to the heart’s longings. Love is what keeps our loved ones alive.  My Mom is a wise lady. I respect and admire her, as much as we butt heads many days. Mom always tells...

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Five Lessons: Expecting Sunshine 1st Birthday

Five Lessons: Expecting Sunshine 1st Birthday

One thing I have noticed since losing my son, Zachary, is how I appreciate milestones more deeply. I love celebrating the birthdays, and other special days, of my two rainbow babies and my daughter, who was one-year-old when Zach passed away. So too am I grateful to wish my “book baby” a very happy birthday. One year ago today, I published my memoir, called Expecting Sunshine: A Journey of Grief, Healing and Pregnancy After Loss (She Writes Press, April 18, 2017).   When I look back on this past year, I realize there are many important lessons that I have learned. These revelations grew out of my challenging season of grief, the newness of slow-earned healing, and the process of writing, editing, and publishing my story.     Five Lessons on the Birthday...

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What Doctor Who Teaches us about Grief

What Doctor Who Teaches us about Grief

Today I welcome Elizabeth Thoma on Wanted Chosen Planned for a special guest post. The power of storytelling is this: We realize we are not alone. We see that other people have survived what seems insurmountable. We learn how to cope and even thrive after loss. I am grateful for all the vulnerable guest stories shared on WCP. I am grateful – today specifically – for Oberon and his short but precious life. Oberon’s Story:   Three years ago at this time, my son Oberon was home in hospice care. We knew he was going to die, but we didn’t know when.   If you saw our home now, decorated for the holidays, you’d probably think everything was OK. It isn’t. Yes, there is joy in our house, but there is still heavy sadness and grief. We have “two...

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A Healthy Grief Movement

A Healthy Grief Movement

I want to bring people together to create a “Healthy Grief Movement.” Will you join me? What I see as some of the “manifesto points” of this movement: People are encouraged and feel comfortable talking about their own losses and speaking with others who are grieving. Sharing stories of life and death that help both the storyteller and the listeners. Children are brought up understanding that death is a natural and beautiful part of life. There is a healthy vocabulary to discuss challenging topics. There are cultural rituals to support the bereaved and remember the deceased. These are just some ideas. Do you have others? Though I am not entirely sure what this “Healthy Grief Movement” will look like, I have made some graphics to...

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6 Holiday Memory Making Ideas for Bereaved Parents

6 Holiday Memory Making Ideas for Bereaved Parents

  If your heart has been broken by the loss of a child in miscarriage, stillbirth or any time after delivery, the holidays may be tough. It’s a season that emphasizes children, family and togetherness. All the things bereaved parents yearn for.     When a baby dies, no matter what the age of the fetus or the child may have been, parents are left shaken, shattered and searching for hope. When my son, Zachary, passed away in my arms just moments after entering the world, I felt like my heart was torn in two. Even though those moments I had with him were heartbreaking, I also treasured each and every one. Nothing, I discovered, could part a mom and dad from the love they have for their child.   What I didn’t learn until later, however, was that...

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Healing Art for Mourning Moms – Register Today

Healing Art for Mourning Moms – Register Today

I am incredibly proud to announce a course I will be teaching called Healing Art for Mourning Moms. The course is only a few weeks away. Registration is now open. If you feel the pull, please sign up right away as the class maxes out at an intimate twenty participants. Healing Art for Mourning Moms Taught by Alexis Marie Chute, MFA, BFA A four week art-based course designed to help you grieve and heal from the pain of miscarriage, stillbirth or early infant loss.   In WEEK 1 participants will be welcomed into a judgement-free space to express and discuss their losses. The group will use creative writing to look at grief from different angles and uncover each individuals’ unique healing vocabulary. In WEEK 2 participants will use their writing from the...

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