Resource Round-Up 8: SIDS Calgary

Resource Round-Up 8: SIDS Calgary

There are so many amazing and compassionate resources out there for bereaved families after their losses and as they become pregnant again. In this resource round-up, I will share some of the books, retreats, organizations and other supports that I feel are doing amazing work.   SIDS Calgary Society (SCS)is a non-profit volunteer organization that offers support to families whose infant or young child has died suddenly and unexpectedly. We advocate for the interests of these families, provide education to health care professionals and the public, and support research to better understand sudden infant and childhood death.  SCS offers a variety of activities and supports to families affected by SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome), SUDI (Sudden Unexpected Death in...

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International Bereaved Mother’s Day

International Bereaved Mother’s Day

Today is International Bereaved Mother’s Day. It is a hard day for me. I am joyful, because I have this amazing opportunity to celebrate my son Zachary, who died eight years ago, BUT I am also bulldozed by sadness. I miss him. The day he was born feels like yesterday – and also a lifetime ago. I wish he was here. I doubt I will ever stop wishing this.     Over spring break a few months ago, my family visited Disneyland for a couple days. As we drove to LA, we chatted as a family about our excitement. Then I said, “I wish Zachary was with us to have this fun experience.”   Then the waterworks erupted. My husband, Aaron, put a loving hand on my knee as he drove. I cried big fat tears.     International Bereaved Mother’s Day is another...

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International Bereaved Mother’s Day: Honoring our Birth Stories

International Bereaved Mother’s Day: Honoring our Birth Stories

Today we celebrate International Bereaved Mother’s Day. We honor precious children that have died and their Mothers whose love and bravery are to be respected and commended. The loss of a child is one of the most painful experiences a person can endure. At the same time, speaking for myself, I would never erase my pain. It is evidence of love. It speaks to the short but meaningful life of my first son, Zachary. Yes, my memories are tinged with sadness, but more so they are shrouded with love. Do you notice my theme here? LOVE Love is what binds us. Love sustains us. Love is the answer to the heart’s longings. Love is what keeps our loved ones alive.  My Mom is a wise lady. I respect and admire her, as much as we butt heads many days. Mom always tells...

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Life is truly precious

Life is truly precious

Today I welcome Carolyn and Adrian Aarnoutse here on Wanted Chosen Planned. As Carolyn shares her story of meeting and losing her son, Willem, I felt like I was with her, remembering my own loss and reliving those emotions. I honor the bravery of Carolyn and Adrian in opening up their heartache to us, and also I join with them in celebrating their precious baby Willem and his important life. Here is Willem’s story: I wake up every morning with the feeling that a part of me is missing; my heart is heavy and feels broken. We felt so blessed and proud to have five healthy and perfect children.  Our sweet Willem came into this world with one fast push; a healthy 6lbs 5oz boy. His three sisters and one brother loved him dearly. Often, I would see them carrying...

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A Video Game to Cope with Grief

A Video Game to Cope with Grief

I listened to one of the most touching Ted Talks just a few days ago. It was about a family that designed a video game to cope with the grief of losing their son. It was so touching that I wanted to share it here. THE DRAGON, CANCER A little background: When Amy Green’s young son was diagnosed with a rare brain tumor, she made up a bedtime story for his siblings to teach them about cancer. What resulted was a video game, “That Dragon, Cancer,” which takes players on a journey they can’t win. In this beautiful talk about coping with loss, Green brings joy and play to tragedy. “We made a game that’s hard to play,” she says, “because the hardest moments of our lives change us more than any goal we could ever...

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