Five Lessons: Expecting Sunshine 1st Birthday

Five Lessons: Expecting Sunshine 1st Birthday

One thing I have noticed since losing my son, Zachary, is how I appreciate milestones more deeply. I love celebrating the birthdays, and other special days, of my two rainbow babies and my daughter, who was one-year-old when Zach passed away. So too am I grateful to wish my “book baby” a very happy birthday. One year ago today, I published my memoir, called Expecting Sunshine: A Journey of Grief, Healing and Pregnancy After Loss (She Writes Press, April 18, 2017).   When I look back on this past year, I realize there are many important lessons that I have learned. These revelations grew out of my challenging season of grief, the newness of slow-earned healing, and the process of writing, editing, and publishing my story.     Five Lessons on the Birthday...

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Healing, But Not Whole

Healing, But Not Whole

I am thrilled to welcome back to Wanted Chosen Planned Jenny Albers! She is graciously giving us what I might call PART 2 to her initial guest post about losing her baby, called “Grateful Despite the Grief” (click here to read it). I appreciate the vantage point Jenny takes when viewing life. With no further delay, here we go.   Healing, But Not Whole Healed. A word that, according to Merriam-Webster, means to “make free from injury or disease: to make sound or whole.”   After three years of missing my baby, Micah, I don’t believe I will ever be completely healed. My heart has a permanent injury, a hole that will never be filled. And our family is missing one, making wholeness an impossibility.   But time has allowed for healing,...

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Grateful Despite the Grief

Grateful Despite the Grief

Today I share a special guest post by Jenny Albers here on Wanted Chosen Planned. Welcome Jenny – and welcome everyone reading this! We are just a few days into the new year and it is a perfect time to share powerful stories of the “new normal” lives we find ourselves in after loss – and a perfect time to celebrate the children who are not with us. Grateful Despite the Grief:   I found out I was pregnant in October 2014, after experiencing an ectopic pregnancy earlier in the year. As much as I would like to say that I immediately began plans for bringing a baby home, something just didn’t feel right. Despite a number of ultrasounds that confirmed all was well, I remained skeptical. I just couldn’t shake the feeling that...

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What Doctor Who Teaches us about Grief

What Doctor Who Teaches us about Grief

Today I welcome Elizabeth Thoma on Wanted Chosen Planned for a special guest post. The power of storytelling is this: We realize we are not alone. We see that other people have survived what seems insurmountable. We learn how to cope and even thrive after loss. I am grateful for all the vulnerable guest stories shared on WCP. I am grateful – today specifically – for Oberon and his short but precious life. Oberon’s Story:   Three years ago at this time, my son Oberon was home in hospice care. We knew he was going to die, but we didn’t know when.   If you saw our home now, decorated for the holidays, you’d probably think everything was OK. It isn’t. Yes, there is joy in our house, but there is still heavy sadness and grief. We have “two...

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Grief on Christmas Day: 5 Ways to Cope

Grief on Christmas Day: 5 Ways to Cope

First of all: Merry Christmas! However, maybe “Bah, humbug,” may be more appropriate. Grief is hard in the holiday season – and Christmas day may be a nagging reminder of who you have lost. For me, Christmas time is a reminder that my second child, Zachary, was supposed to be a Christmas baby. His original due date was just a few days before Christmas. Around this time, about eight years ago when I was early in my pregnancy with Zach, I remember wondering: Will I be late and deliver a baby on Christmas eve or day? I wasn’t sure if I wanted to avoid or aim for those dates. Will my son one day complain he doesn’t get enough presents because his birthday is so close to Christmas? Will the roads be slippery and I have to deliver in the...

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